Tips, Facts, Advice and Statistics about Giving or Receiving Oral Sex

Greetings and Welcome to Oral Sex Education! Everything you ever need or wanted to know about oral sexual activities. We put this particular page together due to the hundreds of weekly hits in our almost fully developed search engine from both men and women inquiring about oral sex. We listen to our surfers, and this is the result! Fact and stats mixed in with humor so ya don't get bored! Have fun!

Cunnilingus & Fellatio: Highest quoted positions? There are literally infinite number of positions for any form of sexual activity. This means that there is no upper limit to the number of ways that, e.g. oral sex, can be performed. This rather liberal way of interpreting sexual postures leads to odd consequences. Legman, for instance, has suggested that there are 14,288,400 positions for cunnilingus alone! Is he sure that there are not 14,288,401? Personally, I've done it only 13,733,384 times or so.

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Oral Sex Related History, Information, Facts, and Statistics

First, it's vitally important to be able to:
Make a Perfect Blowjob - Drink a Perfect Blowjob

One Shot Glass (preferably "blown" glass" )
Layer Ingredients Accordingly (don't blow it):
1/2 oz Kahlua
1/2 oz Bailey's
1/2 oz Amaretto
Top with Whipped Cream
Suck Down Shooters with Friends

Main Entry: cun·ni·lin·gus
Pronunciation: "k&-ni-'li[ng]-g&s
Variant(s): also cun·ni·linc·tus /-'li[ng](k)-t&s/
Function: noun
Etymology: cunnilingus, New Latin, from Latin, one who licks the vulva, from cunnus vulva + lingere to lick; cunnilinctus, New Latin, from Latin cunnus + linctus, act of licking, from lingere -- : oral stimulation of the vulva or clitoris

Main Entry: fel·la·tio
Pronunciation: f&-'lA-shE-"O, fe-
Variant(s): also fel·la·tion /-'lA-sh&n/
Function: noun
Etymology: New Latin fellation-, fellatio, from Latin felare, fellare, literally, to suck ; oral stimulation of the penis.

Reality of giving oral sex as broken down by the opposite sex!

The mighty sucking females of earth come forward and speak out as to the true feelings, fears, emotions, and complexities of performing oral sex.

1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it.
   
2. Extension to rule1 - So if you get one, be grateful.
   
3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you saw; it is not standard practice to cum on someone's face.
   
4. Extension to rule 3 - No, I DON'T have to swallow.
   
5. My ears are NOT handles.
   
6. Extension to rule 5 - do not push on the top of my head. Do you really WANT puke on your dick?
   
7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get; it is NEVER OK to fart.
   
8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer week" - get it through your head - I'm bloated and I feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have sex right now.
   
9. Extension to 8 - "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls if you're that desperate, go jerk off and leave me alone with my Midol.
   
10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've just "wrecked it" for you.
    
11. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games, smoke a cigarette, watch TV, etc...immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.
    
12. If you like how we do it, it's probably best not to speculate about the origins of our talent. Just enjoy the moment and be happy that we're good at it. See also rule 2 about gratitude.
    
13. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't care about the protein content.
    
14. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV, smoke a cigarette, drink, etc...
    
15. When you hear your friends complain about how they don't get blowjobs often enough, keep your mouth shut. It is inappropriate to either sympathize or brag.
    
16. Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not mean I have to kissit good morning".

The mighty dominate rulers of the planet retaliate

1. First of all, yes you are obligated to do it. If you don't, we will find someone (younger, prettier, and dirtier) who will.
   
2. Second, swallowing a teaspoon full of cream is a hell of a lot easier than licking a dead fish
   
3. You want to talk about farting? Does the word "queef" mean anything to you?
   
4. I will use your ears as I see fit. Don't worry about it and be thankful I'm not pulling your hair.
   
5. If you ever tell me what to say and not to say to my friends again, you won't have to worry about getting those little hairs stuck in your teeth...because you won't have any.
   
6. Maybe if you brushed your teeth and got the dick off your breath we would stick around afterward.
   
7. When you're on your period, stuffing something in your mouth is the only way to stop you from bitching and moaning.
   
8. Speaking of which, if you are bleeding for five straight days, you need all the fluids you can get, trust me.
   
9. You bitch about the taste, but trust me when I tell you that we get the shit end of the stick in flavor country.
   
10. At least there is no danger of a dick bleeding in your mouth
    
11. Play with the balls, nuture the balls, LOVE - the balls
    
12. No matter how good you think you are at it, we've had better.
    
13. Blowjobs are the only reason we spend time with you instead of our friends, take that away and you are, literally, useless.
    
14. Caress the ass, too, we like that.
    
15. Make hay when the sun shines. it's "wide awake" in the morning now, but when you get old & fat (and you will) and looking for some action, gah-ron-tee it'll be "sound asleep".
    
16. If you swallow, then you won't have to worry about getting any on your face, now will you?

Leave the thinking to us, okay girls?

daily oral sex trivia fact - During foreplay, a woman's breast size can increase up to 25 percent-another great reason, and or excuse for oral sex. Perhaps the greatest difference between men and women pleasure-wise is simply that most women do not have an orgasm from penetration, they prefer clitoral stimulation for orgasm and oral sex is #1 on their priority list. If you want to make her happy, you better make sure your tongue is in good wiggle waggle shape cuz' there's lots of competition out there.

First recorded instance of sodomy in China?
Sodomy is one of those ambiguous words. In American law, for instance, it can mean anything - from oral sex to anal intercourse. Generally sodomy is a synonym for homosexuality, implying the commonplace homosexual act of anal intercourse. The first recorded instance of sodomy in Chinese history, figuratively 2 described by the literati as "sharing the peach" occurred in the State of Wei. Thus Duke Ling committed sodomy with a young court official, Mi Tzu-hsia, who had a face "as pretty as that of a blooming maiden."

Blowjob pick up lines :

Yo Babyee, Wadup? Want to play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me, aight?

(Look down at your crotch) Hi there - Well, It's not just going to suck itself. Fulfill your destiny!

Oral sex question and answer time:

Q. Why is it exactly, do men like blowjobs?
A. It's the only time they get something into a woman's head straight!

Q. What's the best thing about a blow job?
A. Five minutes of peace and quiet.

Q. What's the difference between Bill Clinton and JFK?
A. One got his head blown off and the other was assassinated.

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